Once the idea of going on a date comes into your mind and you don't want to chase it out again, you're at least ready to start, she says. The idea is that you should consciously decide how you want to proceed," which will in turn inform how you go about meeting people.
After a breakup, you’ll go through a lot of complicated emotions, including two that can make the recovery process worse: the one that makes you feel like you and your ex are in a competition as to who can move on the fastest and the one that urges you to be with someone else because you can’t be alone. Running into the arms of a new person before you’re ready is not the way to get over someone. You’re not going to be alone forever – there are millions of people in this world!You’ll either end up treating them as a rebound, or just hurting yourself even more because you’re not allowing yourself to properly heal. Just based on chance and probability alone, you will move on and find love again and it doesn’t have to be right now.Divorce is one of the most traumatic events we go through, and when we reach the proverbial "light at the end of the tunnel," many of us feel that little spring in our step and start to think about dating again.So how can you start off on the right foot when you're just beginning to dip your toes back into the dating pool?But it's also tough, she adds, because once you're on the dating scene you can feel like a teenager again, in that shaky, unconfident, not-sure-if-he'll-call sort of way.
So how can you make post-divorce dating—whether you're looking for a good time or a good (relationship-minded) man—less daunting?
Eventually, though, it’s time to start thinking about dating again. Below are some signs it’s time to get back out there to search for a new partner: You can be alone, though you may choose not to.
If you feel compelled to date because you don’t like being alone, you put yourself at risk for entering a bad relationship.
Instead, "it's usually clear when you're not ready," says Susan Pease Gadoua, a therapist and author of .
That is, "when the very idea turns you off." But you can decide that you're ready to at least try.
Read on for 10 tips that will help you get back in Cupid's good graces.